Dear Late Night Delivery Services..

Last night as I was returning home from an evening that included sitting outside in 20 degree weather in a sweater containing small holes and flats on my feet, I needed food. Was it because I was cold? I was certainly not drunk, I can tell you that. I went to the pantry to see if I could whip something up but let's be honest, Would you want to make food at 2am? Me either. I then pulled out the few delivery menus we had and decided I was craving Chinese food like nobody's business. I found the No. 1 Chinese brochure and picked out the most delicious thing I could ever order only to realize that you need to spend a minimum of $10. Come on people! What if you are single and starving??! There was no way that I was about to spend that much on myself so my dreams were shattered. I went online to look up different places but had no such luck. After all of this, I went to my old faithful, Jimmy Johns Subs. I went to their web page and was so happy when I found you can order online. I made a log-in user name and password and clicked on the veggie sub, I then passed out. I woke up an hour later starving, staring at the website and still not satisfied. I put the laptop down, put in Saw and ate a chicken salad and crackers little package. All that being said, I woke up this morning more hungry than I have EVER been. Let's get food?